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Computerized Car
This lady always wanted an expensive car -- a status symbol to drive around and be seen in. She scrimps and saves, goes to the dealer, and plops down several years income for a brand new state-of-the-art, computer enhanced, kick-ass, dream mobile. She's driving off. Decides she wants some music and searches for the radio. The dashboard looks like a control panel at NASA. She fiddles with this button, that gizmo...jiggles these and those, but finally gives up. Can't find the damned thing.
Furious, she races back to the dealership and screams at the salesman. Tells him they forgot to install the radio.
He assures her it's right there in front of her. It's hooked into the onboard computer. All she has to do is tell it what she wants. He demonstrates: "Classical", he says, and *click* the car fills with the sounds of Paganini.
"Blues", he says, and *click* a B.B. King classic plays.
She drives off amazed. "Country", she says, and *click* a Tex Ritter tune comes on. "Folk" *click* Joan Baez sings about the night they drove ol' Dixie down. "New Age" *click* Yanni at the Acropolis snaps on.
She's so captivated by this new toy that she isn't paying much attention to the road. Suddenly another driver runs a light and cuts her off.
"ASSHOLE!!!" she screams.
*click*
"Good morning, everyone. Welcome to the Rush Limbaugh Show."
Author:
Unknown
Received: December 1995